I grew up Mormon (more formally, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints). I was extremely devout - I knew all the stories, kept all the commandments, and attended some form of church service six days a week in high school. I started having doubts and eventually stopped believing in the church. I was only 15 years old. My world was turned upside down. I remember sitting in my childhood bedroom, coming to the distressing realization that this meant I no longer had any idea of what was right and wrong.

Over the next few years, I became a bit of a typical angsty teen atheist. I believed that religion was the root of so much hate and oppression in the world. I spent my free time learning more ‘rational’ ways of thinking about the world. I went away to college and, living away from home for the first time, I explored my identity outside of the Mormon church, learning so much about myself and the secular world.

But as I got further and further from religion, it seemed to still be in the back of my mind. It shaped so much of my life, my morals, and how I see the world. I became interested in how it affected other people’s lives. I started learning more about other religions, mostly through YouTube and Wikipedia. I learned the teachings of Sikhism, Buddhism, Judaism, and more. Eventually, I hit a wall in my understanding of world religions. I had never been to a non-Mormon church service - I knew so much theory, but zero practice. I could count on one hand the number of friends I had who weren’t some flavor of agnostic.

I made a resolution at the beginning of 2024 to change that: Visit 10 different church services over the next year.

  1. Episcopal: St. Mark’s Church in-the-Bowery

    I went to this church primarily because it was the one closest to where I was living at the time. Also, being a Christian denomination, it wasn’t too far spiritually from what I was used to. I was tense walking the two blocks south from my apartment in the East Village. What I was wearing could barely be considered church attire - a red and white sweater with climbing pants - but it was all I had in my closet. The church was small, and attendance was smaller, but everyone smiled warmly and seemed genuinely happy to see my girlfriend and me.

    The service was way more progressive than I expected, even for New York City. The pastor talked openly about his husband. Half the service was dedicated to denouncing white privilege. After the service, I talked to another man who was in the congregation for the first time. He told me that it was his first week out of prison, and truthfully, he was just there to try and get any money that church leaders would give him.

  2. Catholic: St. Alphonsus Parish in Greenpoint

    I told some new friends at the climbing gym about my New Year’s resolution, and they were surprisingly receptive! I found they also had varied and complex feelings towards religion, especially the friend who grew up Catholic. We planned a Sunday to go to the historic Catholic church and got bagels afterwards, which we ate along the East River waterfront.

    Out of the 10 churches I went to, this was by far the most boring. The priest seemed less interested in the proceedings than the congregation, and a dull drone filled the air for most of the hour. It was hard to keep up with the seemingly pre-choreographed sequences of singing, praying, and ‘amens’. I had a hard time keeping a straight face at the sight of a grown man dressed in very fantasy-esque robes, stone-faced, carrying out silly-looking movements with fantastical-looking objects. I guess every religion seems a bit silly to outsiders, stripped of its context.

  3. Quaker: Religious Society of Friends East Village

    This was the first church that I attended by myself. Unable to convince my girlfriend to join me for the early morning ceremony, I made the Citi bike trip alone to the church building. This was the biggest departure so far from the churches of my childhood. Walking into the chapel, all the pews faced each other instead of facing a pulpit. Prayers were replaced by long stretches of reflective silence. In Mormonism, we had a ‘fast and testimony meeting’ once a month where anyone from the congregation could speak and ‘bear their testimony’. This was like that on steroids. People spoke about racism, the genocide in Gaza, and more topics that I did not expect in a church service.

    I stayed for tea and snacks after, and had such a great conversation with everyone I talked to. There was a wide range of ages present, and everyone had views on life that were seemingly informed by both history, world religions, and life experience. I could really get behind what the Quakers stood for, and their long and storied history against slavery, for women’s suffrage, and pacifism all resonated loudly with me. I enjoyed it so much I ended up returning again months later, even participating in a silent anti-war vigil in Washington Square Park afterwards.

  4. Buddhist: Zen Buddhist Temple in the Upper East Side

    This one was the first departure from Christianity in my religious explorations. My girlfriend’s mom was in town and invited me to attend an outpost of her college Buddhist branch in Manhattan. The first thing I noticed was that all of the monks were white men, which was fine! Just not what I was expecting.

    We started with ~15 minutes of lightly guided seated meditation that left my backside aching. I had tried meditating before and always ended up more anxious than before I started, the long stretch of silence giving me ample space for my worries to expand to fill the empty brain space. But this time was different. Maybe it was the physical space or the words of the monk, but I found myself actually able to be at peace while meditating.

    The rest of the time felt something like a college philosophy lecture. The monk talked about the need to let life wash over you and letting go of anxieties, topics I really needed to hear about at the time. He fielded questions from congregation members and responded with thoughtfulness and respect. I again stayed after to chat with others and overall had a lovely morning.

  5. Non-denominational: The Brooklyn Tabernacle in Downtown Brooklyn

    I told another friend about my resolution, who was even more eager to join me in some of my religious pursuits. She told me about a congregation in downtown Brooklyn whose choir had won six different Grammy awards. When we arrived (late) to the service, we were ushered into a large space. Music encapsulated me, people were on their feet, clapping, and there was a full band to support the few dozen choir members at the front.

    I had long heard of the term megachurch, but this was the first time I truly grasped the scale and appeal. The preacher was an amazing speaker, fiery and engaging. The music was awe-inspiring, and the A/V setup was polished. But of course, that came at a cost - nearly half of that day’s sermon was dedicated to a form of prosperity gospel. The idea was that giving money to the church would result in an increase in blessings in your own life, especially financial. This part of the service made me uncomfortable, but the music was so good that I ended up returning again a few weeks later with another friend.

  6. Hinduism: Bhakti center in East Village

    I’ll admit that this one is a bit of a stretch. My friend invited me to “Kirtan Night”. According the Bhakti Center’s website, Kirtan is:

    a guided meditation experience of healing and uplifting sound. Integrating mantra, rhythm, and beautiful live instruments, the group is led toward a deep state of meditation through kirtan.

    I honestly did expect this to be one of the 10 things on this list, but the night incorporated a lot of Hindu symbolism, instruments, and chants of “Hare Krishna”. Unlike the Buddhist church in the Upper East Side, I had a hard time getting comfortable at this meeting. The many different instruments, strange and unrecognizable chants (to me), and practitioners dramatically swaying side to side all led me to feel very self-conscious and distracted. I spent most of the hour thinking about how sore my butt was, desperately trying to shift to a position on the pillow that would lend me some relief.

    Overall, this felt what I would imagine to be considered ‘new age’. Not explicitly religious but based entirely on Hinduism. The crowd of people was definitely the spiritual type, and talked about pilgrimages they had made to India in the past year. Lots of yoga practitioners and meditation enthusiasts. It made me more intrigued by what a more ‘traditional’ Hindu service might look like, but other than that, I don’t think I’ll ever be back.

  7. Islam: Qalam Institute in Carrollton, Texas

    I took an unexpected two-month trip back to my parents’ house in Dallas after a severe ankle injury and subsequent surgery. One day after visiting the doctor in north DFW, I decided to work from a Yemeni cafe called Arwa in Richardson. I posted an Instagram story about the bidet in the bathroom, and an online friend I’d never met in person saw the post and told me she was only a few minutes away! She soon joined me at the table, and we talked for hours until she told me she had to go join her sister for an evening religious program at a nearby Islamic community center. I told her about my resolution and asked if I could join, to which she readily agreed.

    The service seemed to be meant explicitly for people under the age of thirty - a kind of ‘youth group’ followed by an evening prayer service. It was held in an extremely modern building, which felt more like a college student center than a church. It even had an attached coffee shop where I grabbed a slice of vegan banana bread before we started. The service reminded me almost eerily of a Mormon young single adult service. The imam talked about loving your neighbor, being a good representation of Islam in your community, and charity. He was very personable and used no fewer than three different TikTok references throughout his sermon.

    The ‘us vs the world’ mentality was one I was very familiar with in Mormonism. The ‘us vs the world’ mentality is very effective in urging its members to be prominent religious members of their community, both to create a stronger in-group, and to convert others. I also really enjoyed the teachings around charity, and the emphasis on helping the less fortunate in whatever ways you can, rather than just giving to the church (I’m looking at you, Brooklyn Tabernacle). Another thing I was all too familiar with was the expectation to adhere to rigid patriarchal gender roles. Women should be subservient to their husbands, and kids to their fathers.

    I struggled to do the prayer with one working leg, but I managed to get myself through all of the many bows, standing, and “Allahu Akbar”s without knocking anyone else over. Overall, I was left shocked by how similar the teachings were to the church I grew up in. It had more familiar teachings to me than many of the Christian churches I had visited so far. The demonization of Islam in America for nearly my entire life has really warped my understanding of how much overlap there is.

  8. Mormon: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints in Desoto, Texas

    This was my first time going back to this church in nearly five years. When I visited my parents during COVID, I used that excuse to avoid going with them, and then just never picked up the habit again. In fact, I would sometimes plan my visits home between Monday and Saturday, just so I would not have to directly confront the question of going to church. This time, however, I was the one who asked to go. My parents responded enthusiastically, my dad lending me a white shirt and a tie, a combo I also hadn’t worn for years.

    It was surreal to walk back into the chapel that I spent my teenage years hating. I saw lots of familiar faces, most of whom did not recognize me immediately (The mullet and ear piercings probably had something to do with that), but whose eyes widened with recognition when they saw my parents behind me. To be honest, there wasn’t much I remembered from this church meeting; it blended together with the thousands of Mormon meetings I had attended in my lifetime. An opening and closing prayer, songs sung with piano accompaniment from a standardized hymn book, and talks of varying quality from members of the congregation. Lots of babies crying and awkward stares across pews.

    It was strange to be back. It felt nostalgic, but not like a place I belonged in anymore. It was interesting to compare the service with the seven others that I had been to that year. Take holistically - there was not much to make this one stand out.

  9. Protestant: Marble Collegiate Church in Nomad

    This was another church that I went to at the suggestion of a friend. We walked through the front door to an extremely friendly set of greeters and entered the chapel, which was beautifully decorated for the Christmas season. Wreaths hung on every wall, warm light filled the space, and church goers dressed in red on the cold winter morning (including me!)

    The service had performances by both the choir and the gospel choir - a feature that reflected the sizable number of both black and non-black churchgoers. The sermon talked about the importance of accepting others and seemed pretty progressive, openly talking about LGBT+ issues. The service was on par with Mormonism as far as structure - we had hymns and prayers, but not a whole script like Catholicism or Episcopal.

  10. Methodist: Trinity Methodist Church Penang

    It was the end of 2024, and I was running out of time! I had travel plans and wasn’t sure if I was going to have time to go to my tenth and final church. I was in Penang, Malaysia, with my girlfriend visiting her grandma, and when I heard she attends church religiously (is there any other way to attend church?) every Sunday, I realized I could go to church on December 29 and complete my goal right before the new year. I could tell that, similar to my grandparents, the weekly service meant a lot to her, and she had many good friends that she was happy to show her grandchildren off to.

    Similar to the protestant church, this service was also not too different from what I was used to. The service was in English, and there were hymns, prayers, and a sermon on themes I was familiar with. It was interesting that I could find a flavor of Christianity I was familiar with on the other side of the world. Maybe it says something about the truths and desires of all humans around the globe. Maybe it says something about religion being used as a form of colonization in the past and the present. It’s due to some combination of both.

Reflection

Writing these ten experiences out, I’m struck by how much these ten very different churches affected me. I have found myself telling the stories I wrote here many times over the past year, and thinking differently about the religions that I had the opportunity to experience. I genuinely learned something from every church service I went to, and there wasn’t a single one I regretted going to. It was incredibly informative to have my own self-guided comparative religion study class - and to not just learn about the theory behind these different sects, but also the lived reality.

Exploring religion in this specific way as an adult really showed me the different things that people get out of it. Having a weekly space to talk to others about being a good person, and how to live in an oftentimes cruel and confusing world, is not something you can easily get outside of organized religion. I don’t see myself wholeheartedly joining a religion anytime soon, but it has been eye-opening to me to see a myriad of other lenses through which to view the world, and I want to keep visiting new churches for as long as I’m alive.